15 April 2008

vertigo

Most sane people, myself included, are afraid of things like large animals with sharp teeth, rickety suspension bridges, and large groups of hyper children. There are, however, two things in this world of which I am irrationally afraid: needles and heights. Unlike wild wolves and rope bridges, my phobias are unavoidable. I have few defenses against a doctor determined to inoculate -- even fewer, I have discovered, against 20 children determined to push me off a very high platform.


The zip-wire turned out to be among the least vertigo-inducing activities I participated in during our week at English Camp in Santa Susana, a touristy beach town about an hour north along the coast from Barcelona. The climbing wall was much worse. I had made it about half-way when I stopped to contemplate how much further -- higher -- I had to go. I stalled, clinging to the wall like a gecko. At some point I rationalized that it would be far worse to loose face with my students than keep climbing...and up I went.


The most dizzying moment of all occurred atop a pile of 14 plastic beer crates, which I had somehow managed to stack and climb.


Very quickly, I might add. I sensed that if I thought about the physics of it all for more than a few seconds I would faint into my harness. Instead I told the kids to cheer or else, and when the big-people legos fell out from under me, I hung in midair (like J in that play) and danced the macarena in my harness.

If you are going to face your fears, you might as well do it with pizazz.